Fox News Said To Join Trump In Re-Election Reality Show

Fox News is said to be in negotiations with President Donald Trump to co-produce a reality show tied to his re-election campaign. The program, tentatively titled “The Emissary”, will pit selected high end contributors to the Republican party and GOP Continue reading Fox News Said To Join Trump In Re-Election Reality Show

Trump Brain Scan Said To Reveal Large Amounts Of “Styrofoam Like Filler”

A recent MRI is said to reveal that large portions of President Donald Trump’s brain consisted of a useless ‘Styrofoam like’ substance rather than the essential white or grey matter needed to maintain a cognitive thought process. The source, a Continue reading Trump Brain Scan Said To Reveal Large Amounts Of “Styrofoam Like Filler”

Trump Believed International Space Station Was ’I.S.I.S. Threat’

President Donald Trump was said to have considered destroying the International Space Station when he confused its initials of I.S.S. with the Islamic State terrorist’s organization’s abbreviation I.S.I.S. According to an anonymous whistleblower, Trump became visibly upset after reading the Continue reading Trump Believed International Space Station Was ’I.S.I.S. Threat’

House Dems To Further Investigate ‘Who Framed Roger Rabbit’

Democrats in Congress are said to be pushing for an investigation as to whether there may have been unindicted co-conspirators involved in the unsuccessful framing of political activist Roger Rabbit.  The sensational case, dating back to the 1940’s, was considered Continue reading House Dems To Further Investigate ‘Who Framed Roger Rabbit’

Giddy GOP Members Said to “Wet Their Pants’ at Impeachment Hearings

Republican members sitting on the House Intelligence Committee holding the impeachment hearings against President Donald Trump were reportedly so excited for the opportunity to be on the panel that they may have wet their pants during the proceedings. The source, Continue reading Giddy GOP Members Said to “Wet Their Pants’ at Impeachment Hearings

NRA: Large Crowds Of People To Blame For Mass Shootings

A senior executive at the National Rifle Association reportedly told board members that the organization needs to promote the idea that people who gather in large groups have to take some responsibly for mass shootings. The source, who attended the Continue reading NRA: Large Crowds Of People To Blame For Mass Shootings

Report: Humans Inbreeding From Day One Helps Explain ‘World’s Stupidity’

In a disturbing report prominent scientists now believe inbreeding dates back to the very dawn of mankind; their work confirming that every man, woman and child is related to everyone else living or dead. That common thread, they say,  is Continue reading Report: Humans Inbreeding From Day One Helps Explain ‘World’s Stupidity’

Justice Department Targets Return Of ‘Summary Executions’

A legal brief being drafted by the Department of Justice is said to advocate the use of ‘summary executions’ as an “idea whose time has come again”. The term refers to immediately executing a person accused of a crime without Continue reading Justice Department Targets Return Of ‘Summary Executions’

Ivanka Trump To Visit Disneyworld’s EPCOT On Diplomatic Mission

Ivanka Trump, an advisor to President Donald Trump, is reportedly scheduled to embark on a fact-finding trip to Disneyworld’s EPCOT’s exhibits of international countries to bolster her foreign affairs credentials. According to an aide, who spoke off the record, Ms. Continue reading Ivanka Trump To Visit Disneyworld’s EPCOT On Diplomatic Mission

Agitated Lawmakers Tumble In Congressional Laundry Room

A melee broke out in the Congressional Laundry Room when members of the House of Representatives came to blows over the meaning of “separating the coloreds from the whites”. According to a maintenance worker, who spoke off the record, the Continue reading Agitated Lawmakers Tumble In Congressional Laundry Room